A Practical Suggestion

We have an intellectual faculty that has been given to us called our Will. Now most people think that the Will is like something we force, brute determination. But it is not like that at all. The functions of the Will are to decide, place, shift or remove attention. The word attention is derived from two Latin words, ad meaning towards and tendere meaning to stretch. This control of attention is done as either a self-determined act of personal will or in obedience to outside influences. Attention is the creating energy that brings about your reality. Energy flows to where attention goes. The Will can be strengthened through use and with proper nutrition and exercise.

All bad feelings are focusing on what you do not want. When you focus on what you do not want, you are both unhappy and you get what you do not want. Use your will and take your attention off of what you do not want and put your attention on what you do want. The power of decision is your own. You have the power as to how you focus your mind.

Magical Thinking Will Not Get You What You Want

There is a big difference in wishing for something and actually doing what it takes to make it happen. What I have discovered is that everyone wants something greater. The problem is most of us never go after what we really want. We settle for something far short of our wants and desires. Then we create stories, excuses and reasons to prove to ourselves that everything is just fine. It is called mental gymnastics. It is the insanity of doing the same thing and expecting different results. We want to earn more money, we want our relationships to be more meaningful, we know we should lose weight or exercise more or that we should play our part in creating world peace.

What do you really want? Sit quietly and ask yourself the questions, “What would I do if I knew I could not fail” “Who would I be” “What do I really want” or “Why am I here?” You decide.

The real value in having a personal coach is that the process will take you from wishing to acting. How do I know this? I have experienced the coaching process for myself. I have used some of the best coaches in the world. Follow this link and learn what coaching is all about: Marty McEvoy - Practical Empowerment.

I remember teaching swimming lessons at age 14. I had to move the child from wanting to get in the water, to being in the water. That took a decision from the child and the action of stepping into the water and lots of support and encouragement.

No matter what you want, there is a price to pay for it if you really want it. The results you are currently getting in your life are a result of how you have been thinking, feeling and acting. If you want to have different results in your life then you need to think, feel and act in a way that will bring about those results. Magical thinking is only part of the formula. You must take action. The value of the thinking is that it will motivate you to take action. The problem is that most people do not follow through with the action because it makes them feel uncomfortable.

The easiest way to do all of this is to uncover how you are thinking and acting now to produce the results you are currently getting. Then change the way you think and act so that you get what you want. Say for example you are just getting started in real estate sales. This is what you should do. Go speak with all the successful producers in your company and area and ask them how they think and act everyday. Successful people are always happy to talk with someone who wants to learn. Spend an hour with them. You will be amazed at how they think and act.

So today, start thinking and acting in a way that will give you the results you really want. I can help you do that. Contact me at marty@martymcevoy.com. By contacting me, you are acting in a different way. You decide...

Self Confidence Formula

1. I know that I have the ability to achieve the object of my Definite Purpose in life; I DEMAND of myself persistent, continuous action toward its attainment, and I here and now promise to render such action.

2. I realize that the dominating thoughts of my mind will eventually reproduce themselves in outward, physical action, and gradually transform themselves into physical reality; therefore I will concentrate my thoughts for 30 minutes daily upon the task of thinking of the person I intend to become, thereby creating in my mind a clear mental picture of that person.

3. I know that through the principle of autosuggestion any desire that I persistently hold in my mind will eventually seek expression through some practical means of attaining the object back of it; therefore, I will devote ten minutes daily to demanding of myself the development of SELF-CONFIDENCE.

4. I have clearly written down a description of my DEFINITE CHIEF AIM in life, and I will never stop trying until I shall have developed sufficient self-confidence for its attainment.

5. I fully realize that no wealth or position can long endure unless built upon truth and justice; therefore, I will engage in no transaction that does not benefit all whom it affects. I will succeed by attracting to myself the forces I wish to use and the cooperation of other people. I will induce others to serve me because of my willingness to serve others. I will eliminate hatred, envy, jealousy, selfishness, and cynicism by developing love for all humanity – because I know that a negative attitude toward others can never bring me success. I will cause others to believe in me because I will believe in them and in myself.

6. I will sign my name to this formula, commit it to memory, and repeat it aloud once a day, with full FAITH that it will gradually influence my THOUGHTS and ACTIONS so that I will become a self-reliant and successful person.

This has been taken from the book Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill.

Distinctions Between Coaching and Therapy

I have often been asked by potential coaching clients to explain the difference between coaching and therapy. So here is my explanation and most of it is taken from the work by Patrick Williams titled The Continuing Debate: Therapy or Coaching? What Every Coach Must Know.

Therapy is a medical and clinical model and relies on diagnosis. Deals with identifiable dysfunctions in a person and is about fixing the past. It deals mostly with a person’s past and trauma, and seeks healing. The questions always are “Why.” Therapy helps patients resolve old pain. Therapy focuses on processes and feelings, and assumes emotions are a symptom of something wrong. The therapist diagnoses and then offers professional expertise and guidelines to provide a path to healing. Therapy style is one of patient nurturing, evocative, indirect, cathartic and parenting. Progress is often slow and painful. The therapist is responsible for both the process and outcomes.

Coaching is a learning and developmental model focusing on attainable goals and possibilities. It deals with a healthy client desiring a better situation. Coaching is about understanding the past as a context for the future. It deals with a person’s present and seeks to help them design and act on behalf of a more desirable future. The questions asked are: How and What. Coaching helps clients learn new skills and tools to build a more satisfying and successful future and focuses on goals. The coach offers perspective and helps the client discover their own answers. Coaching focuses on actions and outcomes and assumes emotions are natural and normalizes them. The coach stands with the client and helps her or him identify challenges, then partners to turn challenges into victories, holding the client accountable to reach desired goals. The coaching style acts as a catalyst to challenge and is direct and uses straight talk and accountability. Growth and progress are often rapid and usually enjoyable. The coach is responsible for the process and the client is responsible for the outcomes.

Coaching today embodies the superior purpose of psychology. It is not just about pathology, diagnosis and treatment of human facilities. It is, more importantly, the study of human potential and possibility. Since we are by nature infinite and unlimited, all things are possible. The purpose of coaching is not to repair what has been damaged but to cultivate the genius that resides within the human mind and the generosity that resides within the human spirit. Most of us have a story that we have created about ourselves that is so small compared to our potential it is ridiculous. In A Course in Miracles, it says we have been given the wings of an eagle. Is the story you keep telling yourself the one you want? If not, when would now be a good time to do something about it?

Coaching is about empowering people and helping them discover what they want and what they can do, instead of focusing on what is wrong and what they can’t do. By doing this coaching improves dramatically the overall mental health and the quality of life, both personally and professionally. Which would you rather do, focus on the past and what went wrong, or focus on your strengths and write and create a future that is filled with purpose, passion, financial success, love and excitement? Today can be the first day of the rest of your exciting life if you choose it to be. Why wait?

Therapy is about recovering and uncovering, while coaching is about discovery. It is about discovering the greatness that lies within each human being and the possibilities which are limitless. What do you really want?

My company, Practical Empowerment LLC, Marty McEvoy - Practical Empowerment offers its coaching clients a multi-dimensional process, that is able to be put into practice and is workable, and that shows people how to gain power and control over their lives, so they can create and have what they really want. What do you really want? What about you income? What about your relationships? How about your health or your business?

You tell me what you want and I will show you how to get it. Call me today at 608-637-6898 or write me at marty@martymcevoy.com